How The Grinch Stole Christmas

Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot.
But the Grinch who lived just north of Whoville did not!
The Grinch hated Christmas, the whole Christmas season.
Please don't ask why, no one quite knows the reason.

It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.
It could be his head wasn't screwed on just right.
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

But whatever the reason, his heart or his shoes,
He stood there on Christmas Eve, hating the Who's,
Staring down from his cave with a sour Grinchy frown,
At the warm lighted windows below in their town.

For he knew every Who down in Whoville beneath
Was busy, now, hanging a holly-who wreath.
"And they're hanging their stockings," he snarled with a sneer.
"Tomorrow is Christmas!  It's practically here!"

Then he growled, with his Grinch fingers nervously drumming,
"I must find some way to keep Christmas from coming!
For tomorrow, I know, all those Who girls and boys
Will wake bright and early.  They'll rush for their toys!"

"And then...all the noise!  All the noise, noise, noise, noise!
If there's one thing I hate...all the noise, noise, noise, noise!
And they'll shriek, squeak, and squeal racing round on their wheels,
Then dance with jin-tinglers tied onto their heels!"

"They'll blow their flu-flubers, they'll bang their tar-tinkers,
They'll blow their hoo-hoovers, they'll bang their gar-dinkers!
They'll beat their trum-tookers, they'll slam their sloo-slunkers!
They'll beat their blum-blookers, they'll wham their hoo-whunkers!"

"And they'll play noisy games, like Zoo-Zivver-Car-Zay,
A rollerskate-type of LaCrosse and croquet!
Then they'll make earsplitting noises deluxe
On their great big Electro-Who-Cardio-Floox!"

"Then the Who's, young and old, will sit down to a feast.
And they'll feast, and they'll feast, and they'll feast, feast, feast, feast!
They'll feast on Who-pudding, and rare Who roast-beast.
Roast-beast is a feast I can't stand in the least!"

"And then, they'll do something I hate most of all!
Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
Will stand close together with Christmas bells ringing!
They'll stand hand-in-hand, and those Who's will start singing!"

"And they'll sing!  And they'll sing!
And they'll sing, sing, sing, sing!"
And the more the Grinch thought of this Who Christmas sing,
The more the Grinch thought, "I must stop this whole thing!"

"Why, for fifty-three years I've put up with it now!
I must stop Christmas from coming!  But how?"
Then he got an idea, an awful idea!
The Grinch got a wonderful, awful idea!

"I know just what to do!" the Grinch laughed in his throat.
"I'll make a quick Santa Claus hat and a coat!"
He chuckled and he clucked, "What a great Grinchy trick!
With this coat and this hat, I'll look just like St. Nick!"

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch!
You really are a heel!
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel!
Mr.'re a bad banana
With a greasy black peel!

You're a monster, Mr. Grinch!
Your heart's an empty hole!
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got garlic in your soul!
Mr. Grinch...I wouldn't touch you with a
Thirty-nine and a half foot pole!

"All I need is a reindeer!"  The Grinch looked around,
But since reindeer are scarce, there was none to be found.
Did that stop the Grinch?  Hah!  The Grinch simply said,
"If I can't find a reindeer, I'll make one, instead!"

So he took his dog, Max, and he took some black thread,
And he tied a big horn on the top of his head!
Then he loaded some bags and some old empty sacks
On a ramshackle sleigh...and he whistled for Max.

Then the Grinch said, "Giddyup!"
And the sleigh started down
Toward the homes where the Who's
Lay a-snooze in their town!

All their windows were dark.
No one knew he was there!
All the Who's were all dreaming sweet dreams, without care
When he came to the first little house on the square!

"This is stop number one!" the old Grinchy Claus hissed
As he climbed to the roof, empty bags in his fist.
Then he slid down the chimney, a rather tight fit...
But if Santa could do it, then so could the Grinch!

He got stuck only once, for a minute or two.
Then he stuck his head out of the fireplace flue
Where the little Who stockings hung all in a row.
"These stockings," he Grinched, "are the first things to go!"

Then he slithered and slunk with a smile most unpleasant
Around the whole room, and he took every present.
Popguns, panpoolers, pantookers, and drums!
Checkboards, bisslebigs, popcorn, and plums!

He stuffed them in bags, then the Grinch very nimbly
Stuffed all the bags, one by one, up the chimney!
Then he slunk to the icebox.  He took the Who's feast.
He took the Who pudding!  He took the roast-beast!

He cleaned out the icebox as quick as a flash!
Why, that Grinch even took the last can of Who-hash!
Then he stuffed all the food up the chimney with glee!
"And now," grinned the Grinch, "I will stuff up the tree!"

As the Grinch took the tree, as he started to shove,
He heard a small sound, like the coo of a dove.
He turned around fast, and he saw a small Who...
Little Cindy-Lou Who, who was no more than two!

She stared at the Grinch, and said, "Santy Claus, why?
Why are you taking our Christmas tree?  Why?"
But you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick,
He thought up a lie, and he thought it up quick.

"Why, my sweet little tot," the fake Santa Claus lied,
"There's a light on this tree that won't light on one side!
So I'm taking it home to my workshop, my dear.
I'll fix it up there, then I'll bring it back here."

And his fib fooled the child.  Then he patted her head,
And he got her a drink, and he sent her to bed.
And when Cindy-Lou Who was in bed with her cup,
He crept to the chimney and stuffed the tree up!

Then he went up the chimney himself, the old liar,
And the last thing he took was the log for their fire!
On their walls he left nothing
But hooks and some wire.

And the one speck of food that he left in the house
Was a crumb that was even too small for a mouse.
Then he did the same thing to the other Who's houses,
Leaving crumbs much too small for the other Who's mouses!

You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch!
You're a nasty-wasty skunk!
Your heart is full of unwashed socks,
Your soul is full of gunk!
Mr. Grinch...The three words
That best describe you
Are as follows, and I quote:
Stink, Stank, Stunk!

It was a quarter of dawn, all the Who's still a-bed,
All the Who's still a-snooze, when he packed up his sled.
Packed it up with their presents, their ribbons, their wrappings,
Their snoofs and their fuzzles, their tringlers and trappings!

Ten thousand feet up, up the side of Mount Crumpet,
He rode with his load to the tip-top to dump it!
"Pooh-pooh to the Who's!" he was Grinchily humming.
"They're finding out now that no Christmas is coming!"

"They're just waking up!
I know just what they'll do!
Their mouths will hang open a minute or two...
Then the Who's down in Whoville will all cry boo hoo!"

"That's a noise," grinned the Grinch, "that I simply MUST hear!"
He paused, and the Grinch put a hand to his ear.
And he did hear a sound rising over the snow.
It started in low...then it started to grow!

But this sound...this sound wasn't bad!
Why...this sound sounded glad!
Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small,
Were singing...without any presents at all!

He hadn't stopped Christmas from coming!  It came!
Somehow or other, it came, just the same!
And the Grinch, with his Grinch feet ice-cold in the snow
Stood puzzling and puzzling.  "How could it be so?"

"It came without ribbons!  It came without tags!
It came without packages, boxes, or bags!"
He puzzled and puzzed...till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!

"Maybe, Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store.
Maybe Christmas--perhaps--means a little bit more!"
And what happened then?  Well, in Whoville they say
That the Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day!

And then, the true meaning of Christmas came through,
And the Grinch found the strength of ten two!
And now that his heart didn't feel quite so tight,
He whizzed with his load through the bright morning light!

With a smile in his soul, he descended Mount Crumpet,
Cheerily blowing "Who-Who!" on his trumpet!
He rode into Whoville, he brought back their toys!
He brought back their floof to the Who girls and boys!

He brought back their snoof and their tringlers and fozzels!
He brought back their pan-tookers, their dazzlers and wozzels!
He brought everything back, all the food for the feast...
And he, he himself...the Grinch...carved the roast-beast!

Welcome, Christmas, bring your cheer, cheer to all Who's far and near!
Christmas Day is in our grasp, so long as we have hands to clasp!
Christmas Day will always be, just as long as we have thee!
Welcome, Christmas, while we stand heart to heart and hand to hand!

Dr. Seuss